GOING TO YS there was a bridge, I don't remember where a few states south of my hometown i think it was carlyle illinois late spring early summer, the sweet scent of bloom playing across the breeze, the middle of june it was built from concrete and steel but still i was scared what if my path broke like my will, and i tumbled off the side into the kaskaskia and drowned in my own drowning would it hurt for my lungs to fill with water i saw somebody on the other side, i dont remember any details about them either, but i remember that they were human and real slowly i walked across the bridge our paths parallel, but still we knew the other was there solipsism is weak and the magic of a stranger is stronger and a human beings love lasts longer than as far as we can tell, any mountain on the other side of the bridge was the island i looked behind me and it was gone there i stood in that gentle sweet-smelling air MISERY GHOST i want to wake up one day with a stitched up heart i want to fall asleep in the center of a dying star i was a misery ghost in a car i was whisperwood wild caught home is far i would make mistakes no matter how thought smart i would make mistakes make mistakes make mistakes when was your devil done? that little voice that told you to follow your heart well I never could hear it what has my devil done? that little voice who told me "love; don't make art." I never listened to her but I should've cause hardly a day goes by where I don't wish I was you even when you're sick and poor i wish i was you there is somebody waiting in the wings there is somebody waiting with wings angels wander ghosts wondering wondering angels wander ghosts dissonant song they sing

woo! he is new york city in snow, hes everywhere i always wanted to go. atlanta georgia in thigh high socks and a cute winter jacket. ive always been weak for boys in glasses pretty as a (bird/girl) he wants to work at nasa cause hes always loved the stars lets make out and talk about the stars. he told me i took him far far away and i asked to take him further. "we're too young to drink" i said we both knew we did not care. a sip of something from dear daddys closet muddying the ideas we posit...

swathed in mountains falling for the sweet leaves kindness, in hiding sugar cubes all in the pine tea and you're gonna be the darling of all midwest summer season sylvia herself all dressed up european i met you in a dream once and you told me how to play right and i'm still jealous of how good you got your voice to sound that night so god bless you miss rosewater time would take you into its extraordinary arms but you're too fond of love for to seduce ya still, oh miss rosewater i miss the time that we would be young siblings in the wind but a graceful tail and restraint never reduced ya (synths) so god bless you miss rosewater time would take you into its extraordinary arms but you're too fond of love for to seduce ya still, oh miss rosewater i miss the time that we would be young siblings in the wind but a graceful tail and restraint never reduced ya

woke up cold, I was all alone the sun was only starting its rising. there things i been told, there are seeds been sown but there's only light pink on the horizon remembering Your hair, remembering Your face remembering the way You walked with grace, oh god you're my muse I never wanna say goodbye. how ridiculous of a sentiment, but it's true. i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say it was a new religion, it was a brand new day i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say you're a kid in high school. you're on the internet. on your birthday theres a solar eclipse. the leaves fall over the gray sky. upstate NY isn't a wasteland, same kind of beauty. go online sometimes, meet somebody, little bit parasocially. In defiance of the way this Person was born they define your idea of whats feminine. you adopt this person as your muse. you think about things you havent really thought about. you identify yourself for the first time in your life. i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say it was a new religion, it was a brand new day i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say there are several ways to get my brain but they are only found in some places. the midafternoon sun in the wintertime the old concrete buildings all covered in vines the taste of sweet watermelon candy from which you scrape remnants of life, okay! i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say i thought i heard you saying, i thought i heard you say it was a new religion, it was a brand new day

independence is key so leave me alone. independence is key so i must be going. oh well i must be gone this is somewhere someone wants to see but not me! i just wanna get around i just wanna get out of town i can see all the mist and snow that collects outside our window independence is key so leave me alone. independence is key so i must be going. oh well i must be gone this is somewhere someone wants to see but not me! i just wanna get around i just wanna get out of town i can see all the mist and snow that collects outside our window and i gotta be honest i dont wanna do anything but talk to you as the snow builds up outside a fire burns hot in your eyes.

we are foxes, we are cats ive written too many songs about cats we are ten to the tenth power bigger than anything we could ever possibly imagine we are a cify that's been growing for the past four hundred years experienced at some unimaginably fast speed all at once i'm nervous trembling so desperate i'm hiding in the closet hearing you walk around trying not to make a sound as i do with my hands becoming something i'll never understand and I'll swear revenge, I'll swear till kingdom come on the person the moon has made me in the sun and there are points where after all the stress your nerves go numb and it is bliss and it's contentment and it's everything but your brain keeps you safe it's all a dream you shed your true self like a promise ring and i may be just a broken young man but i woke up this morning from a dream I was happy and I was alone and it felt like a nightmare and i wanted to scream but roxanne let's get out of this town this bitch of a city with its poets all dead tell all our friends "i won't be seeing you around" God burn the circumstances to which this led

you can hear that wind, right? it blows through the corners of this room. chills me to the very bone. there's a hole in my wall... so this is the wonder of freewheeling thunder? in glass bottle shattered, an old life in tatters. she said, "i never knew it would come to this, and you should know you'll be sorely missed." but i can't bring myself to give a shit see the seams climbing down the list. THEN CAME COMMUNICATION WITH A GOD. NO NOT THE ONE YOU'RE THINKING OF. ANOTHER ONE. so i saw my flesh change its shape and its texture. and i insisted to myself... "remain. remain. and grit your teeth through the pain" i've been learning to try and smile as it all comes away. repeated once again: "remain. remain. never forget. remain. remain." so this is the wonder of freewheeling thunder? in glass bottle shattered, an old life in tatters. she said, "i never knew it would come to this, and you should know you'll be sorely missed." but i can't bring myself to give a shit see the seams climbing down the list.

there is a change at the end of the line the timing is right and the schedules align so that cigarettes lit as the train pulls away are spent put out on the ground as the next one arrives im making my way im making my way im making my way down to the garden state theres peace in travel space for thoughts to unravel so heres how to meditate thoughts are tied to one place im making my way im making my way im making my way down to the garden state theres peace in travel space for thoughts to unravel so heres how to meditate thoughts are tied to one place ive never been the center of my own life so there are some things i probably just didnt notice there are things i want to have felt in my life but my only dream is to someday grow old satisfied with the knowledge that once i burned with joy and that from here my candle will burn and go out and the light will remain in the hearts of every life I touched. im making my way im making my way im making my way down to the garden state theres peace in travel space for thoughts to unravel so heres how to meditate thoughts are tied to one place im making my way im making my way im making my way down to the garden state theres peace in travel space for thoughts to unravel so heres how to meditate thoughts are tied to one place

I woke up in the middle of the night no that’s a lie I stayed up until high single digits ante meridiem, til the leaves turned viridian the sky grew blue and the trucks woke up and started pacing to their destinations like true faith on blue monday or a new holiday or a new way to pay like i cant help feeling like my good luck has run out, i’m a black cat who cant do that i never knew that, fell flat typefucking type beat my rooms neat, but feng shui in times square the big screens in colors in my dreams cool like a chat room, how flowers like cats bloom and you don't sound cyber, dude you're just saying technology things and they say to me, bratcat you really don't see, they'll catch you but i'm like the breeze, smashing the trees all the debris, brought to its knees keeping the freeze all through june big fucking spacegun, call this shit doom cute space marine, raiding your tomb not like charlton heston that movie sucked too fuck all those empires fuck cortez the killer fuck cate wurtz and fuck crow cillerz i'm just like bridget except i can't yo-yo can't hula hoop either, um, i could buy plushies though i'm just like juni i beat the computer 'sides I got skills I am so not a loser Im not the DPS Im not a bruiser call me the medic call me a chooser I woke up in the middle of the night no that’s a lie I stayed up until high single digits ante meridiem, til the leaves turned viridian the sky grew blue and the trucks woke up and started pacing to their destinations like true faith on blue monday or a new holiday or a new way to pay like i cant help feeling like my good luck has run out, i’m a black cat who cant do that i never knew that, fell flat (is it just me or does this guitar smell like cigarettes?)

woke up this morning with a hole in my chest and a hand in my breast reaching into grab my heart when i was in hell this secret world made me free but now i’ve run far away im taking my own hell with me i’ve been failing my classes i’ve been growing up young my spine’s curled inward, daughter disguise the sun every day i wake up wanna put that hoodie on but my brain tells me it’s wrong it’s said that for so long if my wings twitch cutely, they can’t soar beneath the sun if i’m not perfect, i’m not whole, that’s a lie, I know it’s one but in an ocean of tequila and a snowstorm of tears maybe there’s an island where joy can meet fear halfway... and if i make it through tonight, i’ll wake up tomorrow go out and meet my friends, sharing joys and sorrows i’ll admit it to myself i’ll admit it to everyone else i won’t know the limits of my own small body (and we were the music lovers...) (and the people say we just didn't want it enough, oh the people say we just didn't want it enough...) no matter what dandelion darling i want you to remember all the strength in that little body of yours it’s enough, and you’re enough

clockwork and noise in the ocean of oceans for thousands of years ive been guided by that notion if we could be free from sentiments of meaning would there be any truth to what we were seeing? reply to an email tear a book to shreds take the ford to quickchek and buy a feeling of dread i watered my heart and i aired out my lungs but it feels like a game that i dont think ive won and whoevers out there (there's nobody out there) i'd like to file a complaint there's never been a point in human history when anyone was happy or anything meant anything no matter what happens whether beautiful or sad i'm damned if i will respond the universe is a junkyard, all items overpriced i resign, i quit, i withdraw.

if the sea should overtake me trust you'll be there when i'm gone with the doubts that embody the other me is wrong fall comes for every artist under fearsome white moon was it wonder, then, that I felt? september day like june I just want to gouge my eyes out so I can stop seeing the things I see in the corners of my eyes late at night when i grow to be as old as ben gibbard is now, will i be writing the most beautiful verses of my entire life? I need to get out of this place, we need to get out of this place i dreamt a town with hills up and down which swirled all around i think it was san francisco. i dreamt of a train out the window the first stars floating overneath scurrying cars and a river dark as molasses i dreamt of youth and to tell the full truth I'm so fucking tired of being young When I'm 29 maybe I'll have my shit together i've never felt home but i know its a place it is somewhere to fall in the grassy embrace of the ivy drenched woods in northeast september its a need ive always remembered and i know i'm a little obsessed with location spending my days passed from station to station a million ways to reach destination... a million ways... the world shines as i ride the port jervis line, going to new york.